depth of field love ...

love these tiny, itty flowers in my front yard right now:

confessions + gifts

my friend betsy says i have the spiritual gift of dream catching.

i don't know if i know about that, but i'm accessorized well if it's true.

i've been thinking a lot about gifts + dreams + life lately. i'm doing a lot of growing and changing, and that leads to lots of new thoughts.

in alice in wonderland, the Mad Hatter comments on Alice's loss of 'muchness'.

i feel like i've lost my muchness.

like i'm afraid to go after what i really want. like i might make someone mad if i do, or i might step on someone's toes, or someone might think i'm dumb if i open my mouth.

then last night: meltdown. full on angsty-angst meltdown. i'm getting really close to figuring out my dreams, and taking all kinds of leaps towards reaching them. but for every step forward, there are two steps back. that's part of growth, right? [yes]

after we wrapped filming a little project for the church, and i was melting down on the inside, my friend made me stand in the room we were using for filming and punch his hands. i don't know how to throw a punch, but he made me punch his hands anyway. i was surprised at what i found myself saying while we stood there.

i'm scared, i don't trust, i don't want, i do want, i can't, what if?
so much growth, so fast, means i might have forgotten who i am a little.

i've forgotten my muchness.

i'd like to sleep now, and work on remembering it when i wake up.

photos on the go

favorite recent iPhone photos. rest of the set can be found here.

I'm in a funk this week; one of those where I can't stop listening to the same forty-five seconds of one song. Over and over and over. Ever feel that way? 

January/February Journal

I closed the cover of my January/February journal-slash-life-book. I really didn't think I could finish a whole journal in two months, but apparently my life has been really really full the last few weeks!

I did a little styled photo shoot instead of scanning my pages. Natural light is my love!
The rest of the set can be found on flickr, here.

i listen to the foo fighters when i'm feisty.

today i feel:

*loud

*messy

*not nice

*managed

*pushed

*feisty

*cold

*cramped

*tired

*fast

change is coming. i don't know how, i don't know when or where, but it's coming.

things that have been inspiring me lately [photobooth photos :]]

I'm loving these markers right now: 

 

I could watch this movie every day until forever:

and masking tape!

 

and this book!

and a pretty spread in a journal from my lovely friend betsy 

 

and i'm making good progress on this little list: 

 

much love on this snowy weekend! xoxo

january digital journal pages

I'm trying something new with this digital scrapbooking thing, and I have to confess ... I'm addicted. I love scrapbooking/art journaling, but sometimes just getting supplies out is more time than I have. But since I'm almost always mobile, and almost always have my laptop with me, I can find little scraps of time to put spreads together [or like last night - I finished this set while laying in bed and watching a movie at midnight]. I'm liking how this is fitting my life, and helping me learn all-important Photoshop skills!

I learned a lot from this pretty lady: www.shimelle.com

And gathered some supplies [paper backgrounds and stamps] from here: www.twopeasinabucket.com

and most of the supplies I used were by Erica Hernandez.